The memory of his face
is starting to blur around the edges
like the face of the person on the
bar stool next to me after a night
of heavy drinking.
There was a voicemail I had saved
for a year after we split- he had
called and said “I love you” to
my machine a hundred times and now
I can hardly remember the sound
of his voice but I know that once
it used to bring me to shivers-
even the way he said my name
fucking knocked me out.
I finally used my favorite
conditioner for the first time
in two years and the smell didn’t
send me rushing back to a shared
shower in a hotel room and his
hands applying it’s softness to my hair.
And now the distance is slowly
wearing out his name
and I know in my heart
the feeling could never be the same
once time got her ugly old hands
on it and started
turning it to dust.

“Distance”- 11-30-13- jessicagadziala


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